Don’t flatter your children; but the heart of the problem is in the parent trying to find hope and acceptance from their child rather than from God.
A child can sense his parent’s insecurity, and will feel the weight of being expected to bear more than should be expected of him. This is where the violation of boundaries comes in. Not respecting God, the parent won’t respect the child either and will begin to try control the child when he doesn’t live up to their wishes. Then discipline for the sake of the parent’s insecurities will come in, something entirely different from right, godly discipline, discipline for the sake of the child and for the glory of God.
The only solution is in the parent beginning to look to God, for hope, for acceptance, for their needs to be met - for the parent to do what is necessary to repair their relationship with the Lord. Only then will the relationship with the child begin to go down the right path.
“The fear of man is a snare, but those who trust in the LORD will find safety.”
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