Hymnus Deo

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Location: Greensboro, NC, United States

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

A Psalm for Lent

Psalm 80 in metre. To be sung to the tune Bryn Calfaria.

Hear, O hear us, Is-rael’s Shepherd,
Who drives forth Joseph like a flock!
From the cherubim, O shine forth!
Rise in valor that we be saved!
So arise in sight of Ephr’im,
And Manasseh and Benjamin!
God, we pray, O turn us! Bring us back!
Make Your face shine, and we are saved!

O how long, LORD God of Armies,
Burns your wrath at your people’s prayer!
With the bread of tears You feed them,
And full measure of tears they drink!
Strife you make us to our neighbors,
And our foes laugh at us in scorn!
God of Armies, turn us! Bring us back!
Make Your face shine, and we are saved!

You brought forth a vine from Egypt,
And to plant it drove nations out.
You made room to root it deeply,
And it flourished and filled the land.
Then its shadow wrapped the mountains,
And its boughs hid the cedars tall!
To the sea it thrust great branches forth.
And young shoots to the mighty stream!

Why have You torn down its fences?
It is plucked by each passing hand!
Forest bears have gnawed upon it,
And wild creatures have pastured there!
Turn again, O God of Armies!
Look from heav’n! Visit this Your vine!
So uphold what Your right hand did plant,
And the son You raised up in strength!

It is burned and hewn in pieces
By Your frown will they be destroyed!
Lay Your hand on him You favored,
Son of man that You raised in strength!
Then from You we will not wander;
Make us live! We will call Your name!
O LORD God of Armies, turn us back!
Make Your face shine, and we are saved!

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

The Dangers of Meteorology

LOCAL WEATHERMAN MENTIONS “SNOW” IN FORECAST, NEARLY BEATEN TO DEATH WITH FISHING POLE

GREENSBORO, NC (AR NEWSWIRE) Skip Schlopfenheimer, weatherman for local news affiliate WUSS, nearly died after being beaten hundreds of times with a fishing pole, police reported Sunday evening. The suspect, Joe Bob Wilson of Randleman, allegedly attacked Schlopfenheimer in the parking lot of WUSS Sunday afternoon. Wilson, who was caught in the act, has pled “no contest” to the charge.

“I was just crossing the parking lot, when he pulled in front of me in his pickup. He pulled his fishing rod off of the gun rack, jumped out of the truck, and started cursing at me and flogging me,” said Schlopfenheimer.

“Damn weatherman had it coming,” said Wilson. “I speak for all the people ‘round here. We’re sick of these people making promises. Skippy’s a pansy anyhows. He needed a good whipping.”

“I only mentioned “snow” once,” said Schlopfenheimer. “It was a slip. I swear it was.”

Police report that Schlopfenheimer would be dead, if his co-worker Sandy Hoffman hadn’t pulled into the parking lot a few minutes later. “Sandy’s a strong woman. She held Wilson down on the icy asphalt until we could get there.”

“All I heard when I got out of my SUV was, ‘Snow, huh, WUSS boy? Does this feel like snow to you?’”, reported Hoffman. “I knew immediately what was happening. I’ve been expecting something like this to happen for years now. Other weathermen have been smart enough to move away, to Phoenix or Chicago or something. Somewhere where the weather’s more predictable. Not Skip, though.”

Police say they have impounded Wilson’s truck, which had a snow shovel and a brand new sled in the back. The receipt was found in the glove box. “We think we know now why he was so upset,” said police.

“I would have spent that money on ice melt if I knew we were going to get this crap,” said Wilson.

After recovering, Schlopfenheimer is planning on taking a vacation, he says. “I’ll probably go to Hawaii. Volcanos are much safer than a Piedmont native’s temper.”

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Long vacation

My apologies for such a delayed absence from blogging, especially to those of you who are just dying to read what I might put on here next. Seriously though, I have been doing a little study that has kept me away from blogging. Some of this study may eventually manifest itself here. But until I have more time to write, let me recommend another website:

http://logreshall.com/

This is the website of my friend William Chad Newsom, author of Polycarp: The Crown of Fire and Talking of Dragons. Buy his books, and read stuff on his website. He also has a weblog, which you will find a link to on his website. And while I’m talking about him, thanks to Chad for linking to my blog on his website.